The Mind's Alternative
by The laughing Mann
Summary: Ray gets a free game demo that's about to shake up his already crazy life! Read becuase it's just that awesome! Very OOC yet funny. Haiatus.
1. A 21st century Storm

Disclaimer: I don't own beyblade or any of its characters, just my own spastic mind.

Whoo! I'm taking a new approach to writing! Yays! So, read, review, flame or whatever else one can do this! But I'm feeling crazy!! Crazy like coconuts!

And this is a warning!!!!! If you like angst! I'm about to make that frown turn upside down! Yay! Upside down frowns!

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The Mind's Alternative.

Ch 1. A 21st Century Storm

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Ray's POV

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The day it came, it all started. Everything odd, deamonic, ominous, eerie, stranger than fiction… It all started. I mean, never before have I seen my boss sprout horns… no, no, correction, I did once… Okay, so not everything was normal before, but this package that I still don't see how the mailman shoved into the door slot started a chain of events that I will never forget. 

As I entered my house, arms full of books, papers, and mail I stumbled over package. I gasped as the things in my arms attempted to run away. Shouting and dancing around probably wouldn't help, but it was the best got at the moment. Just as I thought I had everything settled and all balanced again a thunderous noise behind me startled me, causing me to drop everything.

I spin around to glare at the ringing phone. I really need to change that ringer… The death march was funny the first three rings.

I dive at the phone, successfully knocking over the entire stand and slamming my head into the couch cushions.

"Mmff! Mmamf mmhft!" Was about all they heard.

"… I'll call back later…" The deep rich voice stated dryly.

I inhaled deeply, finally freeing myself.

"Wait!!! It's not like that!" I shout, turning three different shades of red.

"…" Maybe he's still on…

"Kai…? You still there?" I ask, I can't hear a dial tone, but you never know…

"Yes, I'm here." He responded, making this night suddenly much better.

"Oh, good, what did you want?" I asked, sitting up strait and stretching my poor arm. It was nearly crushed to death by that cushion!

"… Never mind, it doesn't matter." He said shortly.

"Gahh! No! Don't hang up!" I freak, sending my end table flying again! "Le gasp!" I shout diving after it again.

"…Bye Ray, have fun." Kai adds sarcastically and the receiver clicks, informing me I just made a fool of myself over the phone.

Go me, capable of nothing. I grumble as I stand the table back up and pile my tons of junk back on top. Perhaps I should consider sorting through that stuff… later.

I clean up the entranceway and pick up that package. I fall over the back of the couch (purposely this time) and star at the unremarkable brown wrapping paper. I slowly peel off the brown husk, revealing a big box with a game and a few promo things in it.

I read: free game demo, free t-shirt, free instruction manual, free cardboard box, free brow wrapping paper (if you shredded it, it's your problem!)

I turned to my mostly intact brown husk.

"…If I tape it…" I shake my head, and dig around in the box to find a box with the game demo in it.

I looked at the manual, then the box, then my computer.

I decided that manual might taste good stir-fried and that this box will provide all the needed info. So sat down in my awesome swivel chair and popped the first CD into the computer.

I practically glued my eyes to the screen as the loading bar popped up. And here's the highlight reel of my evening.

12percent spinny spinny spinny spinny…

14percent Sick sick sick sick sick.

23percent(you get it now, right?) hungry… hungry… hungry…

26 back with pizza.

32 pizza is gone, box, is gone, attained collection of cardboard origami cranes.

40 changed discs.

41 took a catnap.

48 started flinging pens and pencils into the ceiling.

52 got hungry again.

56 back with Chinese take-out.

57 attempted to master the art of flinging dumplings at my lamp shade.

58 rendered unconscious by stray dumpling.

63 woke from coma due to me thinking I was going to be buried.

68 finished my hour long, one-sided conversation with Mariah.

70 changed discs.

73 spinny spinny spinny spinny spinny.

76 sick, dizzy, sick, dizzy, collapse.

82 waking from coma again.

89 jumping up and down about a bazillion times.

91 dead tired from jumping up and down a bazillion times.

93 party hat strapped on, confetti ball readied, and 3 tons of sugar consumed.

93.5 Running around the outside of my apartment complex stark naked.

97 thrown back inside by the police.

100 showered in confetti and rolling around the apartment on my chair shouting Happy Easter!

I'll bet if Kai had a highlight reel it would say: 1 sitting patiently, 5-98- still sitting patiently. 100- destroyed the computer, oops.

Yup, that'd be Kai, alright. I nod to myself then roll up the computer, spinning one last time before kindda reading the game instructions.

"Arrow keys, more keys, stuff, blah, blah, blah, yeah, yeah, I get it already! It's just like every other pc game!" I shouted at the computer, going a bit crazy (yes, just a bit…).

I clicked through something I probably should have read and another one and then the whole introduction. Oopsie… Too much sugar… and caffeine… and insanity…

Yet somehow I was still able to figure out what approximately was happening. I get to choose a character, and some other things… I sure wish I didn't click through all those directions.

I stared at the screen, waiting for it to maybe help me out. I seen something start to happen and leaned forward. I was almost an inch away when the most horrid thing popped up!

A full screen sized picture of Mariah's face flashed onto the screen. I screamed bloody murder, shouting gibberish about the video game taking over my body and trying to eat soul…

Needless to say my neighbors all banded together and shot me up with tranquillizers. You'd think that over hundred of those darts would kill. (I hadn't meant to wake the people in the complex next to this one…)

So all night I was feeling _pretty_ good. I even figured out that I stared at the computer so long the screen saver started. I had a good, dying chuckle about that.

Then I giggled the mouse and started clicking buttons.

I ended up having a character with black hair pulled into a tacky ponytail, a long dress thing they were trying to call a robe, and he was a cleric of some goodly god. Yay, super special awesome priest powers…

I was really enjoying playing the game too! It was great! I could kill these monsters and gather herbs. Though I really should have inspected that one cuz now my character is covered in a red rash…

But flaws aside, I really like it; maybe I'll buy it. Maybe.

As I played I noted that it was rain outside. I glowered at the window, wishing the curtain closed. They didn't yield so I turned back to game. As I played I was barely phased by the lightning, it was the thunder that was unnerving. I would turn to the window each time, earning me a loss. But I was practically pro! This was easy!

So I didn't even know what hit me when a sudden blast of electricity flew up my fingers. The computer convulsed, sparking and growling. I was knocked back, slamming my head into the wall.

All I could see was black with blips of light as the sparks leapt from the computer, but soon they too died away, washed away by the eternal darkness that claimed.

Unbeknownst to me, the phone rang behind me, ushering me away.

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Duh duh duh dun! Whatever will happen next!? Will Ray live? Will this story take the usual path and send him into the cyber world? Will we ever know why Kai called to hang on Ray? Will I ever quit being annoying? We may never know! Unless you stay tuned for the exciting chapter! Yay! More chapters! 


	2. Flicker Vision

Disclaimer: I don't own Beyblade or any of its characters but I do own the spontaneous characters that appear out of no where.

Whoo! Was the last chapter not the awesomest!? Well lets continue that trend!!! Yay! More crazy!

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The Mind's Alternative

Ch.2 Flicker Vision

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Ray's POV

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The incessant beeping stole me from oblivion. I groaned, sore and stiffed as I flailed around for my alarm clock. 

"Wait a minute… My alarm clock beep…" I suddenly remember and bolt up, rewarding myself by smashing my skull on the computer desk.

"Ahh!" I hiss as I rub my forehead. "I'mma kill that beeping thing…" I groan and look around to find my smoke detector going berserk.

The French fried computer belches smoke and spits sparks. Damnable French people running the electric company. They toasted my computer… (AN: Nothing against the French, I'll bet they aren't even in the elctric busz.)

I groaned and stood suddenly aware that I was in the living room. I look around and catch a glimpse of myself in the TV.

My hair's standing on end with little lines of static electricity weaving through it. I hold up a finger and the lightning jumps off and bounds from my finger to the computer. Jeeze, those French people must really want to assassinate my computer. I wonder what it did to them…

I head to the bathroom to show when I notice I have to be to work in 10 minutes.

"Oh bugger…" I mumble and dash into my room.

I throw clothes left and right trying to find something clean or at least the smells clean. I pick up a pair socks , one whiff sends me reeling.

I really ought consider doing my laundry more often… I'll make sure I get to that…later.

I successfully find and don some 'clean' clothes and fly out the door. I make a mad dash for the bus stop. I can see it! It's going to leave me!

I let out a fierce growl and start really sprinting, thank Shiva, Kai made me run so many freaking laps when I was with the Blade Breakers. I slide up beside the bus, skidding past the doors and stumbling over some old lady.

"Sorry, ma'am, but justice calls." I shout boldly as I jump onto the bus. "To the cat cave!" I shout at the bus driver.

"Must you be so loud?" The bus driver whispers, clutching their head and waving me away.

"Rejection!" I shout, feigning hurt and collapsed onto a seat and inadvertently somebody's groceries. "It was her!" I shout pointing to the old lady I mowed down earlier and vanished to the back of the bus.

"Well if it isn't Einstein." A voice chides behind me.

"Where!?" I dumbly shout looking around before remembering I still had yet to coax my hair down.

I turn to see Kai shaking his head. I sit next to him fuming over him making me look bad (as if I needed his help in that area.). Suddenly I got an idea, and I swore that light bulb only lit up because my hair was powering it.

"Hey, Kai." I grinned deviously. "Wanna feel my hair? Its extra fluffy today." I try to sell him into touching my high voltage hair.

He looks at me like I'm incredibly stupid, which might be true cuz I think that jolt last night fried my brain. He turned away again, sighing exasperatedly.

"Are you at least going to tell me why you called?" I asked, sulking that I couldn't get him to touch hair.

Suddenly a person brushing by me yelped and flew into a seat.

"It bit me!" The man shouted, his hair bristling up.

And of course, with the utmost sincerity, I laughed my arse off. I even noticed Kai smirking and stifling a laugh. Hoorah for infectious laughs! (Thumb up and sparkle sparkle smile)

The man however wasn't as amused…

"How dareith you laugh at me!?" He shouted suddenly flaming and looking very deamonic.

"Ho Goddess! He's gonna eat me!" I shout jumping into Kai's arm.

The bus went silent.

"…" Kai once again was looking at me like I needed some good, no very good, help. "Ray, are feeling alright?" He asked.

I watched his mouth moving but not making a sound. I watched as fangs glinted in the fluorescent lights of the bus. Suddenly he paused leaning forward.

"Gahh! No vampire! No! No blood for you!" I shout, standing and falling over the seat as the bus lurched to stop.

And now I'm stuck. I kick my feet and try to squirm free but alas, my shirt was snagged on the back of the seat and this was very durable material.

"If you promise to go home I'll unhook you." Kai said as folded his arms over the seat back and rested his head atop them.

"Yes, vampire Kai, I'll do as you say, master." I said trying to sound like I was hypnotized. I think it was because I didn't say 'whatever you say master' I was given away.

He glared icy daggers at me as he disappeared behind the seat. Suddenly was falling, and just as suddenly I was stopped.

"Oh, my neck…" I groaned as I flipped forward, accidently clubbing that old lady with my feet.

She turned with this little old lady glare, you know, the one that says 'I'll kick arse as soon as my arthritis medicine kicks in'.

"I clobber you in the name of love!" I shout and tear from the bus as we arrive at my office. My, that was convenient timing.

I ran into the office and, to much of their dismay, I also ran into their clear glass door. Suddenly the door became a whirlpool of swirling red energy with eyes bearing down on me. I shrieked bloody murder as I turned and ran. And Once again it was into a solid object.

"Halt, peon, you are causing a commotion." A knight in a full suit of armor informed me.

I sputtered as I tried to edge away, bowing and stammering out apologizes as I felt around for a door. The knight only glared at me as I fell back into the office and skittered away into the crowd of people congragating around the front desk.

* * *

I eased myself into my cubical, sighing comfortably as my clutter appeared to be the only normal thing about today. 

"Young apprentice, I heard you were bothering the knights again." I heard crackling voice behind me say.

"Say what?" I asked swiveling around to see our _other_ resident oddball, Kiki.

"I said- noob, I heard you were bothering the security guy again." She said, snickering at me, I'm guessing it wasn't just the hair though.

"You know what, your mom." I say and swivel back around to my computer.

"Lord Hyunoji wants to see you, young upstart, by midday sun." She told me matter-of-factly and vanished.

I stuck my head out of my cubical to watch her swish away.

"Quit talking like that! It's annoying!" I shout at her back and slid back in before she can hurl anything at me.

Suddenly a fireball whips by the cubical.

"By Shiva's good grace…" I whisper. "You bloody pyro!" I shout recovering slightly.

"Pyro!? I'll show you pyro, noob!" She exclaims and chucks a fire extinguisher at my head.

I duck and it sails over, crashing a few cubicles down. (que massive explosion clip)

"Yeah, they defiantly need that after the flaming wad of paper you tossed!" I shouted peeking out.

"Flaming paper?! I never threw any thing on fire at you! I threw a red stapler at your face, noob!" She shouts, picking up another projectile.

"Then explain why my hair was singed then!" I challenge.

"Your brain's fried! You came here barbequed!" She defended, pressing a fist to her hip.

"I was not! … Okay maybe just a little…" I admitted.

"Exactly noob-ola." She sneered and sauntered off, her nose in the air.

I stick out my tongue and dive back into my cubical. I began moving papers around, trying to make it look like I was actually doing something. A window suddenly flitted onto my computer screen, announcing the arrival of new mail:

---Kon,

My office, now.

---Pres. Hyunoji---

Hmm, sounds like he wants me badly, oh, bad thought, bad thought, bad thought.

I slinked out of the cubical and down to his office. The secretary knows me by footfall… I think that's telling me something…

"Mr. Kon, you're really pushing your luck today." She states, not even looking up.

"Sorry." I smile widely and look back at her.

Suddenly she was replaced with some elven woman that was concocting some strange blend. It had a very exotic smell that made my brain tingle… or was that just the stray static charges still gathered in my hair?

Either way I slid into the office, which was pitch black with a soft glow of incense burning.

"I guess its not only the secretary using tranquillizers at work." I accidentally say out loud.

"What was that, Kon?" Hyunoji growled the room suddenly bathed in flames as the chair swiveled around to face me.

Mr. Hyunoji sat bathed in blessed light looking purely angelic.

"Now that ain't right." I say again and instantly dive behind chair.

"Whatever can you mean?" He asks pleasantly, that innocent smile still on his lips. "Is there something wrong."

"… I'm…ill." In the mind.

Suddenly he leans forward his blessed glow turning red and smoke wafting from his mouth.

"You should get that looked at… It can't be good." I say, edging back towards the door.

"Kon, you are this close to losing your employment here." He indicates this on his fingers. "Straiten up or leave." His skin reddens and his hair bristles.

"I'm going to die." I mumble, the color suddenly fleeing to from face. I'd follow if I hadn't thought it was just running into his face.

Each second that ticked by seemed to encourage the sanguine complexion to brighten.

"Well, Kon, are you going to step up to the plate?" He asked waving his hand towards me.

I, of course, take this literally and walk up to his desk and take the plate on top of it.

"I'll carry the plate, and wash it, and dry it, and…" I start rambling gripping the cold porcelain plate so tight I thought I'd snap it in two.

"Get out of my office." He growls and more smoke billows forth.

I make a mad dash for the door, just as I touch the door I hear him behind me.

"Have a nice day, Mr. Kon." He says sweetly, the angelic glow returned.

"You have issues. I have the name and number of an excellent physiatrist-" and once more I was interrupted by that deamonic roar of his that says 'you can die tonight and nobody will notice'.

"Yes sir!" I salute and rush out the door. ...Yet I couldn't let that go unchallenged.

So I poked my head back in the door.

"They would too!" I shout and slam the door behind me.

I hear the distinct tinkle of broken porcelain. That does not bode well for my future here.

"You've done it now, Kon." The secretary says dryly.

"At least I don't smoke crack at work." I retort, knowing how lame it was and start towards the door.

"I have to get rid of it some time." I heard her mumble behind.

Thus why the next few minutes of videotape would show a deal going down. Unfortunately she refused to give any so I had to go home and cash my paycheck. Probably my last pay check. But at least I was saving up canned food for this. I've got enough canned corn to last a year! I even thought ahead enough to buy can opener.

I was just about to the bus stop when I heard a soft scuff behind me. As I turned I came face to fang with Vampire Kai.

"Gahh!" Shout and hold up my fingers making a cross. "Now wait a second… How come Christianity is the only religion protected from vampires?" I stop to ponder.

"To make you ask." Kai grumbled, settling on the hard bench.

"Ya think so?" I wonder if people back then could see into the future then? … No, no, my brains just fried. "Would you quit that, I'm having a bad day." I cross my arms and pretend to sulk.

"Aww, does kitty need a hug?" An annoying voice behind me teases.

"Back off jerk face or I'll eat you alive." I hiss as I turn to face Kiki.

"Sure, but the only problem is you'd fry me with that hair of your before you could touch me." She laughs as I grit my teeth and growl throatily.

Suddenly my vision flickers off then on and I see Kai slid in behind her, his fangs sinking into her fleshy neck. My vision flickers again and she standing their laughing mutedly. My vision flickers again the world starts spinning. Flicker. Kai is upon me, his fang dripping blood, openly displaying his insatiable hunger. Flicker. Kai standing beside Kiki in battle of silent words. Flicker. So dark, so cold, so deathly silent. Flicker. Sky. Blue sky over head. Flicker. Black, red, black. Flicker. All so black.

I'm so cold, so very cold. Why is it so quiet? Why aren't you here any more!? What's going on!?

Flicker. Black, nothing, void, silence.

* * *

Dun dun dun duh!" What now?! Will Ray recover some his electrocution? Will those weird auditory hallucinations cease? Will his computer take over the world? And will my favorite topic come into play in this fiction? Will I ever stop asking questions I'm not really interested in hearing your answers to? We'll find out! In the next amazing chapter! Yays! More insanity!

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Whoo! And now… My response to my reviewer!- 

A Friend For Life And Beyond: Actually when I thought of this story the first idea starter I wrote down was needs to be angsty and death ridden.


	3. The Ol' Switheroo

Disclaimer: I do not own, only in my dreams… Insanity, you lied to me!

Whoo! Was that last chapter decent? Yes, you say? Oh, yes, thank you, this is a new bathrobe. Oh, your flattery will not make this update any faster! Though it sure helps.

–wink- But any ways, on with the fict!

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The Mind's Alternative

Ch3. The Ol' Switcheroo

_(Then... I have to back the kangaroo...darn)_

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Ray's POV

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I awoke to hear the birds singing and the to see the sun shining. I stretched and glided over to the window to eye my breakfast. That robin was looking particularly plump… 

I was about to say what a wonderful day when suddenly I remembered this wonderful day was suppose to be spent in my 3' by 3' cubical. I shriek as I look at the alarm clock and start dancing around the room trying to pry off my pajamas. That's when I noticed I was already ready for work.

"Thank you Shiva… For your wonderful enlightenment… last night…" I mumble and make a mad dash for the door.

As I'm swinging around the corner I notice a person standing in my kitchen. They were hovering about the stove cooking a delightful smelling breakfast. I wonder if it was that blue jay I'd meaning to snatch…

I rushed up and planted a kisses on their cheek while simultaneously snatching a piece of toast.

"Thanks for breakfast hunny, but I'm going to be late." I say and make a run for it.

Suddenly my throat seems to tighten and lurch backwards, to see Kai standing over me, my tie in his hand, er, fist.

"Where do you think you're going?" He growls, yet it actually seems kind of nice of him to ask.

"To work… where else would I go?" I can't help but wonder how he broke in.

Maybe we disguised himself as a box and the mailman is actually Santa and he stuffed Kai through the mail slot! Yeah, that's how he did it. I'm positive.

"You are going nowhere but back to your bedroom." I can't help but feel slightly unnerved.

"Listen, Kai, we can play masochist and sadist when I get back from work." I say trying to inch out the door, which might I add is awful hard to do on one's back.

For the briefest of seconds I seen a complete and total rage flicker across his face seeming to say - I'll kill you and little dog too.

However he recomposed himself and then next thing I knew I was flying! I swear I was air born for almost 3 seconds. That's better than my previous attempts!

"Wheeeee!" I shout just seconds before crashing into the window, successfully scarring away breakfast. "Damn you gravity."

"It's not gravity you have to worry about." Kai hisses, holding up some leather straps. "You ready for some bonding time?" He hisses, smirking evilly.

I scream bloody murder and try to jump out my window. On lookers below would see something like this…

Some guy splattering against a window, then hastily opens, then hastily tries to run on thin air only to be dragged in by some guy that actually can walk on air.

So with that the next half an hour was spent ties to a kitchen chair with Kai's eyes zeroed in on me.

"Seriously, mister kidnapper, I have a family and three children! Please don't eat me!" Maybe I can tug on his heartstrings.

However I had forgotten one minor detail, he lacks a heart. Okay so that didn't work. Think Kon, think! Eureka!

"Please mister incredibly hot gay guy, I'm allergic to leather!" I try looking like I'm very itchy. The reward for my effort is him tightening the bonds.

I groan and gasp when he suddenly lets me go. I somersault onto the floor and roll until the couch stops me.

I'd be more grateful if it didn't have wooden side panels. I stare at my toes, which are hanging in my vision and notice that they painted.

"Oh, very funny, Kai, very funny." I grumble ceasing my foot to get a closer look at the nail polish. L-O-S-E-R. Now I think I will go hid under my covers.

Instead I do the next best thing, I skitter under the couch. Unfortunately for me it's a bit to short and I'm a bit too big. Never the less, it was at a 45 degree angle with the floor.

"What are you talking about?" He asks, crossing his arms and sitting on the couch.

Now I'm pinned underneath, with one couch leg pinning my pants to the floor.

"I'm talkin' about your stupid nail job! I shout, wriggling free of my pants so I can show him my nails. "This is not funny!" I shout, pointing to my foot as I crawled out.

"Kon, why did you paint your toenails?" He asks, looking at me as if I need some help.

"I don't have time for this!" I shout and dash back to the bedroom.

As I'm hopping towards the door, pants half on, Kai watches bemusedly from the couch, acting as if that's his throne.

"You've already broken in so just go out the same way you came." I shout as I slid them on completely.

"You've already been to work and I've taken you home." He stated, suddenly leaning on the door in front of me.

He glares down his nose at me, his eyes seeming to glow brightly. Suddenly a high pitched beep behind me sounds. I whip around to see my fried and thoroughly toasted computer snap to life.

"Uh, does your fried computer ever snap on like that?" I ask, suddenly more leery of the computer than sir not-so-nice-guy here.

I back into the door, and inadvertently Kai. I was now in his arms faster than you can say- French fried computers freak on Fridays.

"Is today Friday?" I whisper, trying to see if my alliteration applied.

"It's Monday." He says matter-of-factly.

"Close enough." I shrug and fumble for the doorknob, "lets beat it, I don't trust that thing."

He slides through the open portal without complaint and slams it behind us.

"Now what?" I ask, waiting to hear the computer try to come through the door for us. I kid you not, it eats souls.

"I'm going home. You can either join me or you can fight with your spastic computer." I could see him wanting to add a comment on that last part.

"Yeah, yeah, which it probably got from me, get some new material." I say and writher out of his grip.

I peek inside the door and I swear on Shiva's good name, the computer growled and jumped for me. You could hear the crash over my scream, which is a feat in and of its self. I make fire truck's sound wimpy.

"I accept your mission." I say to Kai and jump back in his arms. "Forward ho!"

And thus why I went down 5 flights of stairs the hard way. I was stuck with my feet in the air, pedaling an invisible bike and my hands outstretched.

"Kon, what are you doing?" A little old lady ask, squinting through her tiny bifocals at me.

"I've rented an invisible bike for the week and though I'd see how well it handles stairs. Cheap arse bike." I grumble and continue to kick pedal and at the very least fall over.

"Don't worry, ma'am, we're on our way to get his medicine." Kai says as he walks slowly down the stairs.

"Oh, you're his attendant, bless your soul and god help you." She said patting Kai's arm before drifting back into her apartment.

Which of course cues me making funny faces at her back. Kai rolls his eyes and starts for the door.

"Wait!" I shout, kick pedaling one last time. "I'm stuck!" I try to look pouty and give him best puppy-dog face.

He shoots me this look that say 'I kick puppies', he does the nice thing and lifts the 'invisible bike' off me.

"Better?" He asks.

"That was so funny I forgot to laugh."

This time he picks me up and carries me over should as if I'm a rolled up rug he's taking to the trash. I'm half expecting somebody to come over and ask if that's a dead body or just doll. His response- what dead body?

"I'm not dead yet." I accidentally say out loud.

Of course, by now, Kai's use to my gibbering. Hmm, I wonder what all I could get away with.

I notice some lady who really needs to wither lose weight or quite wearing spandex, but I shout at her back.

"Oy! Lady, you got two raccoons wrestling in your pants." I flop back down, acting pleasantly dead.

Then thing I know is she's storming down the sidewalk at us and I'm thinking- I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead over and over again.

However he steps seem to go right by us. I lift Kai's arm and look under it to see her attacking some homeless guy with her purse.

"I heard that you drunken slob!" She shouted, really ripping on the poor guy.

"Good job Kon, get the homeless guy beaten up." I mutter out loud.

* * *

Well that this terminates another wonderful chapter. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it! But once again I bet your asking some questions like: Does this story have a plot? Are we ever going to do what the starting box thingy says? Are we ever going to do something that might actually be mildly interesting? Well, you will never know, unless you stay tuned for the next amazing chapter! Yeah! Aren't you all revved!

* * *

And now for a response to my delightful little reviewers- 

A Friend For Life And Beyond: Thank you, I enjoy your dedication to my fan ficts. But in thruth, I have no idea how I got something so crazy when I was shooting for angst, maybe I was feeling too good and happy, I dunno.


	4. Mama Mia!

Disclaimer: This one does not own Bey Blade, if I did, I'd be too busy writing X rated programs.

Byut, Yeah! It is a good day! A good day to die! Or maybe read a fan fiction! Yay! Brace yourself for crazy! Cuz I'm crazy! Lets all go crazy! Yeehah! Crazy!

* * *

Mama mia!

_(♪There I go again♫)_

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Ray's POV (still)

* * *

Flop back against the door, sighing a shaking my head. When life throws you lemons make invisible ink…. Wait… Yeah, I'mma stick with invisible ink. 

I feel like smashing my head against something hard, maybe then my life would since.

I groan and stretch, feeling stiff. I wince as I sit up, prying some rocks out of my back. My head throbs and demands attention, however when I raise my hand to my head I realize I'm holding something.

Thwak!

I club myself with a thin staff with a elegant swirling design scribed in it. I glower at the staff.

"How darith you strike me." I growled at it and then look around.

It would appear that Kai disposed of me in a field… However I don't know too many fields around here that have chocobos in it…

"Oh bugger…" I mumble as they come stampeding my way.

I shriek like a little girl and ran away. But much to my dismay I trip over the hem of my long robe. I crash into the ground and scream as I try to flounder away.

As is my luck, the chocobos run me down. I groan and push myself onto my hands and knees. I stagger to my feet and stumble along the cobblestone path. As I'm walking along all of a sudden my hand starts to tingle and giddy sensation spreads through out my body.

I smile widely, glinting evilly.

"Take me to my precious." I croak, holding out my hand.

My middle finger suddenly lights up and flashes rhythmically.

"That cannot be healthy… But hey, if it leads me to silverleaf I'm all for it!" I chirp and run for the rare herb.

I zigzag around the forest, following my finger light as it brings me to a tiny silver bush that looks on the verge of death.

"Oh boy! Silverleaf!" I shout and as do a few other voices…

I look over to see two other people crowded around the bush. We glare between each other.

Suddenly a little gremlin holding a sign up walks out of the bush.

Signs reads: Three,

Two,

One,

Fight!

We look between each other and all throw out a fist.

"Rock, paper, scissor, shoot!" We chorus together and all throw out our hand again.

I threw out scissors and the other two threw out paper.

"Ha ha! I win!" I shriek jumping up and down.

Suddenly the person across from me starts throwing daggers at me. I scream and dodge around them, dancing and maneuvering in odd positions.

"Sore loser!" I shout and blast him with a Holy Missile.

The person flies back, flying high into the air and twinkling in the sky. I hold my hand away from me, grimacing at it.

"Yikes…" I say hoping I don't accidentally unleash it on myself.

I turn back to the bush to see that other person had already raided it for himself.

"Ahh! You sore loser! Get back here!" I scream and rush off to go beat the guy to an inch of his life with my staff of doom!

As I'm running all of a sudden a giant panther pounces on me. I shriek bloody murder and start blasting away at it with Holy Missile. It was only after I blasted it for fifth time did I notice it was stuffed.

"Congratulations, you just murdered a stuffed animals." A voice behind me snickered.

"Pardon my French but you're an idiot!" I shout and throw the fake cat at him. "Away to justice!" I shout and run away, as fast as I could.

I dive into a bush only to find another person huddled in there.

"You too huh?" He asked, his head covered by his hands.

"Mama mia!" I shout and take off running again.

I turn back to see the other person gophering. His head peeking out of the top of the bush for a few seconds before he resumes hiding.

I take to a tree and stay in it as I watched the few people ambling past. I sighed dejectedly and fall against the tree.

I hear a weird sound that sounds oddly like somebody drooling. I turn to see a bat like creature with a herd of spiders sitting a few branches over.

They probably heard my screams two towns over.

I was out of that tree and clinging to another travelers back with in a nano second.

The person tried to look back at me, but every time he tried to look back at me I hustled over to the other shoulder. Once I had his running in circles I hopped off and blitzed down the road. No way I was going to say hi to a berserker that could tear me in two the long way.

"Champions of Rice! To me!" I shout and take off a nice brisk pace.

After what seemed like eon, okay a few minutes, I got to a little town. It seemed quite nice, with the exception of human skulls adorned on the pikes…

But hey, I've been walk for almost three whole minutes! I need a break! What am I, a beyblader? Oh… right. I am…

I slowly marched into town, a pouch I pulled from hip stuck on my head and my robes pulled up to my waist to show off the wonderful spandex I was wearing underneath.

"Fear me! I am the almighty Stores-a lot-in-his-Belly!" I declare to the orcish community.

They grunted something and pointed to me. With a quick smile I stuffed some bent up paper in my mouth to resemble tusks.

I grunted and made monkey sounds and hopped from foot to foot. However they weren't as amused as the person behind me.

"That is precious." The person laughed, slapping their knee.

I turned to glare at him and pointed back to him.

"Eat him, my minions!" I shout and oddly enough the orcs actually do attempt to eat him.

"Elfsies is good taste." They grunt as they crowd around him.

"Then taste away!" I cheer and edge away. Once I was certain they were plenty distracted by the rude elf I rushed away.

I ran in circles at first, I mean very small circles. But then I sling shot away and ran out of there like there was a very, very angry certain bey blade captain on my arse.

I shrieked bloody murder as I emerged from that village with a dozen or so growling and starving orcs trying to mow me down.

"Thank Shiva!" I screamed as I ran and hide behind two well armored elves.

They looked down at me with looks that said: I'm bored and you're just the entertainment I was looking for.

"Eheh, hiya, fellows… But uh… I hate to eat and run but I got places to …" Began but decided the confused looks the two were passing each other was my cue to leave.

I screamed, flailed my arms and ran away.

* * *

After an hour or so of running I had finally came to a place that seemed friendly. I snuck inside the open gate and strolled around the town. I clapped my hands and started doing the electric slide cuz I was in place that I could actually read the signs! 

"My god, id he alright?" I heard behind me.

I stopped doing the electric slide and looked back the two women gossiping. I raised my staff towards the sky and bowed.

"I am the All mighty sovereign of Mout. Kill-em-all!" I stated and whooped and jumped around. "And that is my official greeting!"

And with that I ran off and slid into the first tavern I seen.

* * *

And With that I bid you all good day. Another insane chapter down and many more where that come from! -thumb up and sparkle smile- 

And now, a response to my wonderful reviewers! Yays!-

* * *

Jin: Gee! I'm so happy you like it! It makes my insanity go threw the roof to hear people liking my fics! But I hope these and all to follow meet you expectations! Yay! Crazy! 


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